How to Achieve Female Ejaculation (Guest Post)

I worked as a bartender for several years, slinging drinks, chatting people up and making a decent amount of money. The one thing I liked about it was that you never knew what was going to happen when you went in. Whenever there were down times, I would find myself talking to guests about random, funny things. One day, a guest told me about a time that he made a girl squirt on him. I was immediately intrigued. He said, with what I believe was without exaggeration, that she literally flooded his bed when she came.

Inspired by his story, I went home and told my boyfriend. I assumed if some random girl could do it, I could too. We tried and tried, but to no avail, never got it to work. However it got me thinking, just because I haven’t been able to yet, doesn’t mean you can’t….

Every woman is built to be able to squirt–also known as gushing and female ejaculation–it just requires the right stimulation, relaxation and desire to do so. But before we begin your lesson in squirting it’s important to mention that female ejaculation is not purely urine. Studies haven’t been able to fully pinpoint the components, but they have discovered that it is part urine, part phosphotase (the same chemical that makes up semen) and then a mix of inconsistent chemicals. So while you may feel like you’re peeing when it happens, rest easy knowing that it isn’t truly urine. This fluid is released when the G-Spot is stimulated, which is actually located in the same spot, just on the opposite wall, as the male prostate.

Now making yourself squirt is going to require a little more than your usual go-to routine, but the effort should prove to be worth it. You’re going to need your hands or a partner. If you find that your fingers aren’t long enough to reach your G-spot or that they tire quickly, check out a G-spot stimulator like the ones they sell at Adam & Eve.

Be sure to go to the bathroom before you try to squirt, this will help you relax and feel confident that you are not going to pee. Once you’ve emptied your bladder, lay back and find your G-spot. I recommend locating it with your fingers at first so that you can understand what it feels like. You can locate it by inserting your finger about 3 inches and making a hook or come hither motion with your finger. Make sure your finger is hooking towards the top wall of your vagina. Now feel around for a small patch that is rougher than the rest of wall–that’s your g-spot.

Now either recruit the help of your partner or a G-spot stimulator, or combine the two. Have them stimulate your G-spot by rubbing back and forth on it. You will feel it become more sensitive as it becomes engorged. If they are touching you right, you will probably feel like you have to pee. It’s important to ignore this feeling. You won’t be able to squirt if you can’t ignore it.

Have them continue to stimulate you and help out by stimulating yourself. The more aroused you can get the better. If you continue to stay relaxed, you’ll eventually feel your orgasm build. At this point, you have to let go. As women, we tend to suck in our pelvic muscles during an orgasm, but you need to do the exact opposite. Focus on pushing them out, this will help push the fluid down and out and maximize your orgasm. At this point, you should be able to squirt and once you do, you can expect to see anywhere from a teaspoon of fluid all the way up to 1/4 of a cup.

The best thing about squirting is that it’s much easier to achieve once you’ve unlocked it. You’ll also be able to achieve g-spot orgasms a lot more in general. I’m going to keep trying and so should you. Have fun exploring, practice makes perfect.

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Entrepreneurs Promise Aural

A mere six months ago, the German tech company Lust Industries set out to innovate the adult entertainment industry through IT and social media. Based out of southern Germany, Lust Industries sees adult content as “by far the most exciting sector of the international entertainment industry” and are entering the scene as agents of progress, providing “funky new products” for fun, gadget-loving adults world-wide.

The first product that Lust Industries will release is an online content provider and mixing tool for erotic audio called Radiostim. Of course, Radiostim also functions as a social network where niche communities can share and alter the sounds that each other create, aiming to satisfy their own aural desires or someone else’s.

Radiostim is currently is beta and went through its first round of testing and review just a few weeks ago. Lust Industries hasn’t announced an official release date yet, but when I spoke with Lust Industries co-founder Daniel Wagner earlier this week, he told me that a limited-feature beta version will be publicly available soon. Here’s what else he had to say:

 Entrepreneurs Promise Aural

 

 

Jane Fader: Can you tell me a little bit more about why you decided to launch Lust Industries?

Lust Industries: Lust Industries is headed by three guys who consider adult entertainment to be the most exciting sector of the international entertainment industry. For us, adult entertainment is much more than just porn. Actually, we’re not so interested in hardcore pornography ourselves but we appreciate adult content that is enriching and stimulating. And since we see a certain potential for new and innovative products in this market we decided to found a company and to start developing Radiostim which is the main project we’re currently working on.

JF: What attracted you to working with audio rather than in a visual or a/v medium?

LI: One day back in 2010 we were talking about porn and hardcore videos and thought, well, in pretty much all those videos out there we’re confronted with certain things that do not turn us on at all, be it sexual practices, physical characteristics of the actors and stuff like that. We then discovered that, by closing your eyes and thus listening to a porn movie instead of watching it, the sexual experience can be much more intense and richer. By getting rid of the dominant visual layer you’re free to let your imagination go wild. Suddenly you’re not bound to any concrete faces, locations and sexual practices anymore. Instead you’re free to imagine almost anything you want while the acoustic layer of the porn movie in a way guides you through the events that are happening. Through that, the idea of Radiostim was born: No pornographic images, lots of sexually stimulating sounds, plus a couple of cool features. That’s the magic recipe we believe in.

JF: It sounds magical! I’ve noticed that audio is really overlooked as a feature in other erotic mediums. For example, its rare to ssee a “dirty talk” category on porn “tube” sites, and erotic audio books don’t tend to include much beyond word-based language. When Lust Industries started developing RadioStim, were you looking to fill this hole?

LI: When we started working on Radiostim we didn‘t really do an in-depth market research. We simply jumped off and built a first bunch of features that we thought could be cool. Then, over time, a sort of master plan evolved that we still follow today: We want Radiostim to take users on an acoustic journey into the world of lust and human sexuality. We want to satisfy all kinds of sexual demands by the means of stimulating sounds. If you‘re getting turned on by a couple having sex and talking dirty in a changing room of a mall, Radiostim will provide the right sounds for you. We want to achieve this by allowing users to build communities around their sexual desires. Artists will then be able to offer specialized sounds for these niche communities.

JF: AWESOME! Can you walk us through the user experience of Radiostim?

LI: There are basically two types of users: Those who are looking for stimulation (users) and those who want to stimulate others (artists). Those who are looking for stimulation visit radiostim.com, choose the kind of sex they want to hear (straight, gay, solo, couples, groups, etc.) and then pick a location where this sex should take place (a beach, a jungle, a UFO, a Wild West saloon, etc.). At the core of Radiostim is its audio player that combines the chosen sex sounds with the chosen ambient sounds and creates a unique streamable audio experience. Artists will be able to upload erotic audio files and offer them to the Radiostim community. Here is what makes Radiostim dynamic: a 15 minute sex audio file uploaded by an artist is divided into 30-second segments. Radiostim then uses these 30-second clips to create long sounds again by rearranging the pieces over and over again, literally every time a user clicks PLAY. So even if a user listens to the same kind of sex 1000 times in a row, it will never sound the same.

JF: What do you think of audio sex toy products such as the OhMiBod? Any possibility that Radiostim will be able to connect with a gadget like that in the future?

LI: OhMiBod seems to be pretty cool. Our first Radiostim tests have shown that music has a great impact on the accoustic perception of sex. So, yeah, why not bring different tools or gadgets closer together.

Read more about the prototype testing of Radiostim on the Lust Industries developer blog.

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Is Marche du Nain Rouge Racist?

This weekend I attended one of Detroit’s favorite community gatherings–Marche du Nain Rouge. Each spring, Detroiters gather in the Cass Corridor for a celebration ritual in which they get to call upon a myth from the city’s founding and “chase the red dwarf” out of the city. According to legend, an evil red dwarf will be seen in the streets prior to violent tragedies, beginning with an attack of the first white settler in Detroit in 1701 and including Detroit’s surrender in the War of 1812, the Battle of Bloody Run, and the 1967 riots. All of these events are struggles over race and territory.

About 3 seconds after it crossed my mind that the “nain rouge” (“red dwarf”) is probably a reference to Native Americans and that historically, the myth was probably used to villainize Native Americans in Detroit, I saw this:

nainrouge Is Marche du Nain Rouge Racist?

The woman holding this sign is Doc. She stood alone at the beginning of the Marche du Nain Rouge, affecting the necessary shock to present some critical information that seems to have been lost somewhere in Detroit’s compulsion for community. By the end of the parade, a small group gathered around Doc and conversations ensued about race relations in Detroit, the relationship between the historical European American oppression of Native Americans and African Americans, the lacking conversation about race in Detroit, the practice of ritual, and the making and re-making of meaning. You can watch a video of Doc explaining the history of Marche du Nain Rouge on the sidelines of the parade in the Cass Corridor.

What do you think–how much history still exists in this newly-revived Detroit tradition?

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Concept Over Quality: Erotic Film Fest Hits Detroit

On August 26, Detroit will host its first erotic film festival, Detroit Independent Video Erotica (DIVE), a one-night showcase of international short films and videos. I got the opportunity to talk with “the DIVE team” about porn, Detroit’s erotic art scene, and how affordable, user-friendly technology gives everyone the opportunity for creative sexual expression. Check it out: 

Jane Fader: In Detroit, the most successful and beautifully organized art events–the Dirty Show and DAMNED especially–always seem to have sexual themes. Where do you locate the DIVE film festival in Detroit’s artistic landscape?

The DIVE Team: Even though the DIVE Festival is not based on the Dirty Show, the erotic poetry slam, the Noir Leather fashion shows, or any other event, those events do go to show that there is strong demand and participation in the field of erotic art in the Detroit area.

JF: DIVE’s call for art strongly emphasizes the difference between erotica and pornography, but doesn’t offer a definition of either outside of the exemplary. Could you elaborate on the difference between erotic and pornographic?

DIVE: As for the distinction between erotic and pornographic, it’s difficult to say. With mainstream cinema, there are some depictions of sexuality that are pretty explicit, as in films like Shortbus Concept Over Quality: Erotic Film Fest Hits Detroit, Y Tu Mama Tambien Concept Over Quality: Erotic Film Fest Hits Detroit, and Shame Concept Over Quality: Erotic Film Fest Hits Detroit. However, that did not make those films pornographic. All we can say is that we’re not likely to be interested in videos of the kind one would see on YouPorn.com, the sex for its own sake without any sense of style, story, or artistry; the gangbangs; the misogynistic stuff.

JF: What kind of videos and films are you interested in?

DIVE: The goal of the DIVE Film Festival is to inspire people to make (or submit existing) creative erotic/sensual works on video. The criteria for submission is being left somewhat vague because we don’t want to limit people’s creativity. As I’m sure you know, the range of expression of sexuality is vast, in terms of the range of preferences, and in individual expression. We want to be accepting of all of it. The great news is that creating video works no longer depends on having professional-grade equipment. Most newer cell phones and point & shoot cameras have very good video quality, and editing and soundtracks can be done with software provided free on many home computers (like iMovie). These are easy tools for “amateurs” who want to create and contribute a piece. Ultimately, the finest image quality is less important than the overall concept and style. Beyond that, we’re hoping to draw in the artists, too–the people who have a unique vision that they can use to approach this subject matter. In talking with people in the art community, I’ve heard tales of some video work that sounds incredible, and hope that the creators of those works will submit them to the festival. While we expect that most videos will be live footage, there’s always the possibility some will be animated, claymation, stop-action or even a Ken Burns-style montage of still photos that use zooming and panning to create the dynamics. That would be fantastic! Works need not be literal, either. The depictions can be metaphorical or abstract. They can be as short as a television commercial or any length up to six minutes. We want the audience to leave the festival…over-stimulated…(pardon the bad pun).

DIVE is currently accepting submissions of films, videos and animations of all genres ranging anywhere from a few seconds to 6 minutes. More information and updates on the DIVE Facebook page.

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Orgasm is NOT Female Ejaculation

When I wrote about my difficulty with orgasm, I got a lot of questions from people asking whether I was talking about my difficulty achieving orgasm or my difficulty achieving female ejaculation. Any confusion is totally understandable. I would estimate that about 2/3 of the people I talk to about female sexual response are not aware that there is a difference between female ejaculation and orgasm. The words orgasm and ejaculation are practically synonymous in American culture. I am aware of this and and since I have been discussing female ejaculation for the past five years or so, it’s important that I distinguish orgasm from female ejaculation if it’s going to be the new focus of my writing.

Having said this, it is very important to understand that orgasm is not female ejaculationOrgasm and female ejaculation are two very different sexual responses that occur by way of two very different sexual stimuli, are experienced through two very different directions of muscular contraction, and have two very different ways of making their occurrence known. I created this table to help distinguish between the two:

orgasm female ejaculation Orgasm is NOT Female Ejaculation

So to clarify, my last post was about my difficulty achieving orgasm, NOT my difficulty achieving female ejaculation. I have never ejaculated. From my understanding, it is an “advanced” sexual ability for most women, and because it is the stimuli that is pleasurable and not necessarily the response itself that is pleasurable, my motivation to achieve female ejaculation is not as strong as my motivation to be orgasmically “regular.” I have difficulty with orgasm, and I think that a lot of other women do, too. And while I find female ejaculation extremely interesting on an intellectual level, having orgasms is and has always been more important to me.

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